Home sweet home

Turcoise... is my color, its what defines me now: green as the lands Im passing - the hills and the forests and the wildish valleys and majestic mountains of my beautiful country - and blue as the sky Im missing - the freedom, the immensity, the unknown. Im spoprty in turcoise, Im elegant in turcoise, Im sexy or chique or almost naked in turcoise...Im all myself these days, Im peaceful and lazy and careless and cheerful and friendly and appealing in turcoise. But i DINT want to write about my color or my mood or my thoughts, I wanted to write about my discovery of home.

Homeland, I never quite felt the meaning and the weight of this word, I never saw the true beauty of it, I never thought about it nor talked about it. Well, since I saw my homeland from the plane, first thought which pumped into my head: GREEN, this country is green.Then when I landed and went through the regular customs procedures, romanian - these people actually speak romanian and they can understand me if I talk even if I dont want them to...innevitably they would understand my most natural secret language, the only communication way that I felt privileged and I kept for my most personal expression when I was away. Somehow dissapopinting at first, then recatching all its glopry and remembering all the words and re-learning to use it to its full potential. Then, after I got on my way towards the city, sense of humor, gosh how I missed our healthy romanian sense of humor, the ability to laugh at any trouble and to slip a bit of sarcasm or innocent irony to spice any conversation...nothing is borring, nothing get flat, nothing remains without salt & peper, its all a game of the mind and the tongue which sometimes seems poisoned, othertimes seems dipped in honey but you can never know which one is it unless u play after the same rules.

Ain't it fun???

I didnt stay in one place too long, to give myself the chance to catch up to as many people and places as I could. The A place was the beggining...and the end of the first night, in rythms of old but good music, heat that I missed, faces passing by in the same way, friends with the same vibe, same bartenders, same stupid assholes hitting on you, same toilets with the smart prints to "Give piss a chance", same DJ who if asked nicely can offer you a supergirl to spoil your senses, same walk back home after 5 am in a rainy bucharest dawn, to refresh our hangovered selves just enough to fall in a deep sleep and wake up 3 hrs after the first meeting of the second day. Welcome back! The right way :)

Meeting postoned, 2 coffees and 2 hrs of shopping after, my old window to the world of my student self, my old favourite bookshop, same old favourite tea place - fancy tea, not egyptian bedouin tea - new old friends, saying hi, saying bye, surprisingly close, nad naturally surprised by my new story telling self... not surprised enough to stop asking many many questions...but Ive got all the answers anyone can ask me for.

Snapshot of my first two days.

Now, one month and a half after

( 5 days home to see my parents and catch my breath,

2 days in Vama Veche - black sea, chilli waves, good live concerts, quality drinking, crazy friends -

another day in Bucharest with Billy Idol and the A as hosting place for great friends meeting,

10 days in Paris faling and falling in love with the looks and sounds and smells and vibe of the french core with the hep of good old Jacek,

another day in Bucharest with the right people for the right re-welcome home,

1 crazy out of this world week at home with some exotic touch,

1 unwanted but extremely exquisite and finnally accepted as a necessary evil wedding, many relatives,

a week in dear heart of transilvania, Sibiu, old places, old loves,

1 week in almost hungarian lands, discovering babysitting is not that bad, you can actually loose weight with it,

1 hitchhike and a countryside visit )

Im back in my home. cozy bed, lazy attitude, good food, warm friends, unexpected rediscovery, 2 beautiful starry nights full of memories and tenderness. No mopre saying goopdbye, Im just saying hello now, Im answering calls to visit or to join or to have fun together and looking for a drop of active feeling wihtin myself, solving serious legal identity issues or future career development, reading my eyes off and not getting enough of it, preparing for another wedding, new old encounters, new goodbyes.

This is me now, happy but in snapshots, calm but restless, wanting to move but staying still, breathing the light mountain air, enjoying the wind in my hair while im swingging in a craddle, clopsing safe in my mind the precious immages of my beloved mountains, the flow of the water, the green of the hills, the smell of the pine trees and of fresh wet gound, feeling with every inch on my skin the heavy cold nourishing rain drops, melting in the heat of a lopng forgotten passion, closed in a small room top rest my body and escaping to the great beyond, in search of the green and the blue, as I am turcoise.

Which color are you?